New tech acquired

I got me a new mobile phone. It's snazzy. It's a slide phone, as opposed to my old clam shell phone. And it's a walkman phone. I enjoyed the walkman feature of my old phone, but it was not as good as the new one, which has the Sony walkman seal, meaning there's been taken measures to ensure a good musical experience. And it is good. Nice sound with the in-ear plugs, as well as the ability to use your own headphones. Nice.
It's still new, and I still need to setup a few things - but overall I'm very pleased with it. Let's see if I end up doing a full review of it.

Traffic rage pt. 1

Stupid ass lorry driver. So first he goes left when I try to pass him on my bike to the left side. Then he goes right, as I fall back and try to pass him on the right side (because he left me no other option). Mind you that at no time during this, does he signal what he wants. Then he turns on the emergency/catastrophy/warning signal, while still driving.
"No Mr. lorry driver. Having signal lights blinking to the right and to the left, does NOT mean you can act like an indecisive teenage girl, and drive as you please".
- and he has the nerve to toot the horn, as I finally pass him, and signal with my hands, that he needs to make up his mind, and alert the rest of the traffic about his intentions in a clear and decisive manner. Jerk. I hate traffic. People will litterally kill eachother (and other people at random) just to gain 5 seconds, or one place in the queue at the next signal.

Election time

Danish prime minister Anders Fogh Rasmussen, has officially announced the election. Set for Nov. 13th.

I vote for "That Guy".

Dun-dun-din-din-dundudun-din-din









Take advantage of a unique voting opportunity, to directly influence the danish election, through grotesque media-manipulation and brainwave-control.

How is this even possible, you ask? Science my friend. Science and a vast amount of dirty money, paid to mad professors in eastern european countries.

Look for the poll on the front page, and excercise the right the danish government doesn't wan't you to have.

* image courtesy of Fox

I don't read many books...

- in fact I more or less don't read books at all (comic books and educational litterature not included). Between 1990 and 2006 I've probably only read one book, which was Bill Bryson's "Down Under" - a gift from Kim before I wen't to Australia in 2000.
But I've slowly started reading books again. I prefer "real" stuff - like biographies and "travel logs". So last year I read a book about a boating trip in and around China, I read the biography of a local, and slightly controversial, soccer player (whom I also wen't to school with). This year I've read a book about a danish special ops soldier, and I'm currently readin a book about why girls are weird, and why guys are also weird - only in another way...

But I've not enjoyed reading as much, as when I read Alex Uth's latest release "Marskens Hemmelighed" (that's the secret of the marsh). It's the first piece of fiction I've read in a looooooong time, and it was great. Granted I'm a bit older than the target audience, but you're never too old for mysteries and thrills.
Now Alex has a way with words. Or - she has her way with words. I don't know. But they do seem to take a very describing and picturesque form, when lined up in the right formation. I actually think she's a visual artist - she paints with words, to form very detailed images in people's imagination. Obviously you need to have imagination, but the crisp and detailed descriptions, makes it very easy.
I've had the pleasure of working with Alex at Runestone, so I'm already familiar with her writing, as she was responsible for most of the backstory on the game "Seed", so I know she's a great writer.
Anyways - I can highly recommend this book, though once again - aimed at a younger (danish) audience.

Coffee and stardust...

- sounds like caffeine and cocaine orgy. It was nothing that drastic though (except for the caffeine part), but Jan got a little time-out from the twin-raising business, so yesterday we hooked up at Baresso (and they hooked us up with coffee). We later took a stroll through the local mall, and ended up staring at the movie posters at Cinemaxx (although I suspect he had planned it all in advance). Fortune had it that we could just make the afternoon showing of "Stardust", and despite a rather gay looking (yes I am once again using that term negatively...) poster, the movie was fab. It's a really well written, and well told adventure, with everything that particular genre should contain. And a really great cast. Some big names in lesser roles were introduced in cool ways. Visually nice too, so a highly recommendable movie.
- must be the first time ever that I've gone to the movies with absolutely no treats or drinks - but we were in a hurry (commercials were almost over). And at least we got to kick a bunch of grotty teenagers away from our rightfull seats (even if they were not THAT great)...

Trendy toilet paper?

Be honest. When was the last time you we're taking a dump, reached for the TP and thought to yourself: "Dear me, this TP just doesn't match my bathroom. I really need to find some TP that compliments the interior decoration of my bathroom".
- like never, right?

Lambi has the following little nugget on their six pack of TP of the "Satin" brand:



-------------------------------
LAMBI TREND COLLECTION
brings the latest trends to your bathroom.
This season's must is ever elegant grey,
or as we see it: poetry of silver.
After all, style is all about details.
---------------------------------

- I read this little nugget and I wen't huh?! It's TP, for crying out loud. It's designed to wipe crap from your corn hole. It's the essense of use-and-throw-away-products. It's the godfather of use-and-throw-away-products. Should we really care about how it looks? It could say "Sandpaper grain 16" on it, as long as it didn't feel like it. It could have print of barbed wire on it, as long as it feels soft on the butt cheeks.

Lambi trend collection... What the fuck. I mean WHAT THE FUCK?!?

And just to add insult to injury...
It's no secret that TP has about the same structural integrity as mashed potatoes. In other words it is very close to falling apart from the stress of it's own weight (so don't ever use TP for hull plating on your next spaceship, NASA).
With this already more than weak structural integrity, would you think it was neccesary to perforate anything but the line that seperates the sheets? I say no. Lambi says yes. Yes! YES! Let's perforate the ENTIRE sheet, except for 10 little flowers on each sheet, because TP with patterns AND perforation is the new ideal for ass wiping.
You have to be friggin kiddin'! Who was the idiot product developer, who let his or her 3-year old kid design the TP now situated on my TP-holder? The person needs to be fired, then hired and fired once more. This TP is only useable, if you meticulously use a FLOWER part of the sheet. Anything else... well - let's not get graphic about that.
Honestly - if you absolutely HAVE to put patterns on TP, use coloured print. I'd much rather have a green butt, than - well once again with the graphic details...

MORONS!

*image courtesy of Lambi

[DVD] Eragon (of AlaGAYsia)

This is a gay movie. Why? Well...

The "hero" is a 17-year old kid - Gay
- who wrestles his cousin for combat training - Gay
- he get's a little baby dragon - Gay
- who's name is Saphira - Gay
- and is a girl - Gay
- who only communicates by thought - Gay
- obviously to save money on CGI lip syncing - Gay
John Malkowich is only semi-evil - Gay
- his dark sidekick is played by Robert Carlyle - Gay
- who is way more evil in Trainspotting - Gay
- and dies without a proper fight - Gay
- in a grand finale battle, which lasts 5 minutes - Gay
Jeremy Irons' character (Brom) dies - Gay
- after having said so many tacky lines - Gay
- on the back of someone elses dragon - Gay
- just because he didn't look after his own - Gay
- but he has a sword that glows - Gay
- which he stole - Gay
- probably from Frodo - Gay
The dark sidekick's henchmen are a bunch of girls - Gay
- who whine when you poke a sword in their foot - Gay
- and die from a small cut on the upper arm - Gay
- but they DO wear makeup to look intimidating - Gay
- and people are obviously intimidated - Gay
The "hero" (once again) doesn't get laid - Gay
- he does not even get a little kiss from the girl - Gay
- even though he saved her bony ass - Gay
- at the expense of Brom's life - Gay
The movie was worse than Starship Troopers 2 - Gay
- it has combat, but no blood - Gay
- it was rushed - Gay
- and predictable - Gay
- and it had a crappy 5 second CGI ending - Gay
- and it's the first in a trilogy - Gay
- so you know there'll be more of this crap - Gay

Seriously - don't bother. Not even if you're paid to watch it. I just spent 104 minutes, which could've been spent more interrestingly by poking red-hot needles in my eyeballs, watching this movie. They get the following rating for at least being able to hold a camera and a microphone boom.

Rating :


* I mean absolutely no disrespect whatsoever to gay people.
** Image courtesy of the blind and deaf monkeys who released this movie.

Happy 60 year anniversary

Signs, sailors, and the best vagenas

Yes please, banana spit sounds nice...
How is that even possible? Some weird genetic mix of a lama and a banana (and would that make it a lamana or banama)?
- can I have a side order of coconut vomit?


Happy sailors.
- classy souvenirs brought back from greece. I love how it looks like they've been wearing them forever. It just looks natural somehow ;)


The best and cheapest... vagenas?
- I guess when your store is not located on the main street, you have to take drastic measures to attract customers...

Lies, all lies!

I read somewhere today that dark chocolate should be the thing to eat, if you're feeling a bit tired or if you've run out of energi.
I just ate a brick of dark chocolate, so I should be wide awake, and jumping of the walls. I am however not. Instead I just feel like taking a nap.

- back to caffeine again I guess.